Saturday, January 9, 2010

Close Encounter With A Random Boobie Sniffer ...

((Okay, this is not the sniffer in question.
This guy is Yuno and he has his own issues.))

The story ...

Yesterday was a busy day at the Gleaners warehouse. There were so many people volunteering that we were running into each other. Tempers were fraying, including mine. Especially at a seemingly homeless lady who was helping to fill my order. She was loud, obnoxious, and obviously "on something".

Turns out she had a reputation for that. Volunteering while tweaking.

I decided that taking a break would be best for my temper. Maybe she would find someone else to pick on. I couldn't complain too much, because she was a very good worker. She did a lot of the heavy lifting ... something I'm not supposed to do much of yet.


Anyway, as I was coming back from break, I heard her voice behind me. Loud. "Oo0oooh! Who smells so good? I think it's HER!!!". Before I knew it, I had 200 pounds of loud obnoxious rude tweaking female plastered to my neck ... sniff, sniff, sniff ... "OH it IS you! You. Smell. Sooooooo Good." It seems she really really ... no, REALLY liked my perfume.

For the next 2 hours, she took every opportunity to trail behind me, taking in the perfume I was wearing as I wafted by. I tried to ignore her.

Until she started diving at me ... nose aimed at my chest ... (Um, when I say CHEST, I mean my very AMPLE, er, bosoms). Each time she would (sniff, sniff, sniff) say "I don't mean to be smelling your BOOBIES, but you SMELL SOoooooo GOOD". This happened at least 4 times.

Very disconcerting to say the least.

Finally she was leaving. I knew I would never be able to wear that perfume again ... would you? So I ran to my purse, pulled out the bottle and GAVE it to her.

She screamed so loudly that I thought I was going to lose my right eardrum.
Then she hugged me. Tight.

But at least she stayed away from my boobies.


  1. Ooooh, Sissy! Ahahahaaa.....LOL I'm just dying here--you are SO funny! I love how you wrote up this story. Ahahaaa...Sissy--you are terribly talented and I loved hearing about your, er, admirer. (guffaw) (giggle) (guffaw)

  2. That is soooo funny...mercy what were you wearing...I need to know so as not to attract large tweeking water buffalos.

    Yuno looks a little put out that you involved him in the whole thing.

    Have a great rest of the ya.

  3. Omg....I would not have been able to handle it and probably would have said something I would have later regretted. lol

  4. The cure for this is to have them come close, turn around, bend over, and fart.

  5. OMG that is such a funny story, but I'm sure it was not funny while you were experiencing it! I'm glad you gave her the perfume. What a day!

  6. I have to add here--that Abe has the solution well in hand. (guffaw) This is just all too funny for me. Thanks again for the great laugh!

  7. Consider it a deep appreciation, (possibly augmented by artificial substances) for you and your taste in perfume. Always a bit unnerving when someone crosses over into your personal space. It sounds like whatever she was on gave her a heightened sense of smell and well dear one... you and your perfume just happened to be there waiting for her olfactory enhanced sniffer to sniff. I wouldn't hesitate to wear the perfume again, just not when she's around. Great, yet unsettling story. I'm sorry you had to be put through that. I pray she gets help for her "tweeking". Blessings to you and yours. Love and Light, Nina P

  8. hahahahahaha!!!!! Oh, I just love it! BUT how creepy, isn't it?